So, it would appear the takeaway is twofold.... from my perspective


1. It would have been prudent to accept their offer if it was a step in the right direction with the additional statement that you would also be filing for a hearing in Court regarding the question of overnight stays. That would also have opened the door for 50/50 to be heard.

2. If you want to procede hire your own certified translator so they can't use that as an excuse to delay proceedings.

Have the person appear with you for the hearing. Instruct them not to interact or introduce to anyone until you are in the Courtroom and the hearing starts. The introduction can be made to the judge at that time if the lack of translator card is played again.

It is important to hire a Court Certified Translator or the person may be decided to be unacceptable. A Court Certified Translator should have a C.V. or Curriculum Vite which would outline their qualifications for the judge.

If their translator shows up you do not need to introduce your hired gun, They can sit silently in the gallery and listen. Later they can inform you of what the conversation between your x and her translator actually was and how accurate the translation was given to the court record.

I think your case will really hinge on what you and your ex have hiding in the closet, if you know what I mean.  If your past is sprinkled with criminal charges, arrests, history of violence, neglect, or any such issue, you could really be fighting a losing battle.  If the case is just a matter of he said-she said, you'll probably have a better chance.  There are many legal positions you could take on your case.  I think there is merit to what KTM said about taking the deal then following up with a motion just so you could start seeing your kids.  The longer you go, the worse it is for them and you.  As a matter of right, everyone is legally due a custody trial anyway.  So, you could take the option (I assume you still can), and you can follow that up with mediation.  However, after custody is settled, you must demonstrate a "change of circumstances" in order to change custody.  Some of these factors are black/white, others are more subjective and a creative attorney can make about anything work.  If you think this case is just going to get drug out more and more, you may be best to take the deal to get your kids, and go from there.  It also hurts your ex's case that you are abusive and a terrible father if she is offering to give you the kids.  If she was so concerned about your abusive nature, why would she offer that deal?

I'm assuming this deal was offered verbal?  If so, I'm not surprised.  Send a letter to try to get that deal in writing.  Then you have even more for your upcoming trial.  You can simply say something like "when you offered to give me parenting time for a few hours a day in court the other day, what days did your client have in mind?  I believe its important for the kids to spend time with me.  Please advise which days your client was considering, and what times."

Your listed points for shared custody, to me, are not good ones.  Most parents I talk with are upset and spend way too much time bashing the other parent and nearly no time bolstering their own abilities and benefits to the kids.  As such you come off looking more like a vindictive, upset parent instead of a good-hearted, level headed, and reasonable parent.

I think your reasons should look more like:
- I've traditionally been the parent to take the kids to school, and my schedule is flexible enough to do that.  I love to do it.
- I used to play soccer and had started working with my daughter to play soccer. She now cannot share that time/bond with me.
- I am a stickler for the rules and honesty. I want to make sure my children are brought up with the same values.  Its important to me.
- My son is old enough, that he needs a positive male role model.  Without a consistent role model. I've always been there for him, and now that has been ripped away, leaving him deprived.

You see how these statements nearly always start with "I" or deal with "me?"  When you spend so much time focusing on how bad the other parent is, you forget how important your role is.  Don't lose sight of that.

to stiwary2002,

Something that worked in my case was the judge (a fair judge) point blank asked her on the stand a series of questions such as, "Did <father> ever threaten physical harm to you or the children".   She (Ex-wife now) answered "NO" on all questions even after she used every resource SRS, Family Crisis, Police etc to take the kids and hide.  Not even my attorney had the nerve to ask or even suggested that we ask that - but he SHOULD HAVE.  If YOU/SOMEONE ARE not GUILTY of abuse, then ASK HER ON THE STAND and tell your attorney that you are not playing like you are guilty.  Your attorney will assume you are guilty of abuse in every manner.   What that did is very powerful:  it forced her to do an Admission of Fact on the record.  At that point, the judge was fair to us both and we share 50-50 parenting time (and of course joint custody). 

Just for the curious, as you might be wondering why she took kids and hid out and came back.  She didn't come out of hidding, rather the Missing Children's Dept using every resource nationally, found them two days before her Mom was scheduled to travel half way around the world to where my Ex's home country.  About out of legal ammunition, my Ex eventually started to say it was "verbal abuse", but Expert Child Abduction witness said, "Parental Child Abduction" ON THE RECORD.  That is a Federal Crime and your local District court won't touch that one and your local attorney won't even bring it up.  I'm Pro Se now and will stay that way.

Hello Friends,

@KTM -- Can you tell me the attorney name as I am scared that my spouse can run away to her home country in near future.

Also to let you know that there is no criminal legal cases against me. There were false police reports made by my spouse and at last she filled PFA while putting my daughter in front. This was done with a long planning with the other feminist lady, friend of her.

My mediation date is confirmed to end of Dec and will continue January next year. This mediation will keep going on and this is fine.

My only question is that What Judge is going to do on Dec12 for child custody, I mean parenting time to me? I am not getting this and my attorney also says this all depends upon the judge.

Can you guys guess on this part?

My guess is that Judge should give me One night a week and every alternate week end till Mediation is confirmed.

Thanks KTM. This attorney is very very expensive. But I will talk to him on your idea to him and see if that works out.

Also my attorney spoke to my wife's attorney and tried to do some bargain on Child access. The other attorney is threatening to my attorney that she will reopen the PFA case. I do not understand what does this mean? They filled the PFA and then took it back and now threatening to re-open that again.

Looks like they are making fun of court and the processes.

Do you have any idea what does re-open of PFA mean to them? How they can do this?
Your thoughts on this are highly appreciated.

We do have the copy of court order that stays "Both parties agree to dismiss the case".

My spouse's attorney is just threatening telling all this non-sense, which is not making any sense to me. Can we put this statement in front of the judge telling that other side attorney is threatening to us.

She brought this statement when my attorney was talking to her about a logical child access to me. She is rigid on "Supervised Visitation".

From my perspective this is all intimidation, and Mom wanting to be in full control.  If there is no reason for Dad to have supervised visitation, then there's no need to do it.  A PFA doesn't mean a parent is not a good parent.  It may simply mean he/she doesn't get along well with the other parent.  Why shouldn't Mom have supervised visitation?  Who says she's not abusive  or neglectful to the kids?  Is someone keeping tabs on her?  It seems to me that your ex is only trying to make sure parenting is as difficult as possible for both you and the kids.

I can respect KTM's, conservative, opinion here.  I just know that if it were me, I would never agree to put my kids through the process of supervised visitation, and I would be immediately filing to change the temporary court order.  I would also hold that tactic against her in court as trying to minimize contact with me, which is not conducive to a good, quality relationship with the kids.  If she is willing to go to that length to ensure dad doesn't have access, what else is she willing to do?  A good parent would be reasonable.  If there were a documented history of abuse to the kids, or SRS had a file on the family, that would be completely different.  It seems the abuse started when the divorce papers were filed.  Seem ironic?  I think not.

Everyone's case is different, and everyone reacts differently.  Just make a choice you can live with.

This is the time when you need to document all of your concerns, issues, and experiences.  Keep track of dates, times, where, how..... These things will be useful to you later (maybe years) down the road when you are back in court.