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Author Topic: KS Case Law  (Read 19977 times)

olatheguyks

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KS Case Law
« on: August 22, 2013, 01:14:30 PM »
I went through a heavily contested divorce that was final in late 2006.  We agreed on a Shared Custody arrangement---after the mediator told my ex that the judge would favor this at the time.  The parenting schedule reflected that out of 2 weeks--she would have them 8 days and me 6.  I am Active Duty military and travel frequently and we agreed that I would have the opportunity to makeup any time I couldn't take with them.  I dearly love my kids---and spent as much time with them as I could.  There was never a shared custody expense plan enacted---and for the first couple of years---we agreed and split costs of sports and other additional expenses except medical which was an 80/20 split.

My ex has never worked.  She refuses to get a job even after the judge requested her to do so.  Her attorney says she is under educated---I have documents showing I paid (when we were married) for her to attend 3 different colleges and she quit each one of them. 

Fast forward 3 years---we are both remarried.  Ex wife totally jealous and the fact that my kids absolutely adored their new step mother.  She slowly turned the kids against my whole family.  They even sent to court and told the judge they didn't want anything to do with me and the judge ordered a no contact order??  These are my kids that I was so close to them---and did most of the parenting in their younger years.  I spent over 35k in attorney's fees from the "prominent" St. Louis based firm that caters to Dads??  I cannot even call my kids---email--nothing.  The only thing I can do is go to public events.  Even though I still have joint custody---I have zero say in any decisions on school, home or other events.  I have to try to call the school to find out events as the only communications I get from my ex are texts when she wants money.

She continually tries to find ways to spend my money.  I've paid for complete orthodontics for all 3 kids---even when they were all 3 considered optional by the orthodonist (paying 80%).  I carry the insurance as well.  Everytime we go to court---since she doesn't work---I end up paying her attorney's fees.  The system has me beat down to where I feel I cannot win---and it has been 2 years since I've had a conversation with my kids--they are totally out of my and my family's life.

My former Attorney told me there is KS Case Law back in time where the courts can end child support obligations when a parent has been cut-off from their kids.  My ex was told she had the responsibility to work towards reuniting my kids with me--where she totally went the opposition direction---hiding under a crackpot therapist's (who is a friend of hers) suggestions.

I want to know what my chances are in getting CS obligations stopped---or at least reduced.  My fear is---since she is not working and only has income imputed for minimum wage---the judge will look at the situation knowing the kids need support from somewhere---and it can only come from me.  Thoughts on this??  Our KS courts have been so upset from events that happened in the 50's and 60's---that the parent who works hard to provide for their family---is totally discriminated against and can put them into bankruptcy and poverty levels.  And if they decide to get a 2nd job to assist---most if not all of that money can end up going towards increased CS.
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KTM

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Re: KS Case Law
« Reply #1 on: August 22, 2013, 05:00:24 PM »
Before responding to this question it is important for us to know the ages of your children, grade level in school, distance from your home and if your criminal record is clean.

However, it can be stated that under the current Laws I understand income from a second job is not allowed to be counted toward income when calculating Child Support.
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Guru

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Re: KS Case Law
« Reply #2 on: August 22, 2013, 06:11:07 PM »
There is a KS statute which says both parents are entitled to parenting time unless the court has ruled it would not be in the child's best interest.  Have a look at KSA 60-1616 (http://kansasstatutes.lesterama.org/Chapter_60/Article_16/60-1616.html).  So, something must have gone terribly wrong for you to have a "no contact" order.  Where was your case heard and by what judge?  Did the court make a finding that you are not a fit father for some reason?  I've heard of drug-addicted parents getting more parenting time.

To answer your question, in my opinion, you'll have nearly a 0% chance of getting child support reduced or stopped just because you don't see your kids.  In KS, they want to see that money changing hands if there is someone employed.  You should have a better chance getting what is rightfully yours - time with your kids.  I don't believe I've talked to any parents who have been completely cut out of their kids' lives by a judge.  I'm betting something else was going on, the judge didn't like your attorney, or wanted to make an example of you or something.  You possibly could have appealed the order.  Your ex should at least have minimum wage imputed as her income level.  That wouldn't reduce your support payment very much, but every bit helps.

It's not uncommon for the KS court system to look right through any efforts you've made to provide and what you've spent.  Instead they simply want to see your paycheck subs and your 1040 so they can wring more money out of you.

After reading through some opinions here, let us know how you think you'd like to proceed and maybe we can provide more input.
« Last Edit: August 22, 2013, 06:17:51 PM by Guru »
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olatheguyks

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Re: KS Case Law
« Reply #3 on: August 23, 2013, 10:54:09 AM »
Oldest child now 18 and emanipated---younger ones are both 16 and have 3 years left in school.  Original Judge was Leben who was fair in my eyes---2nd was Slater who seemed to be personal friends with opposing council.  He retired and it is now Gyllenborg---we haven't been to court with her so don't know.  I think you are correct in that the judge didn't like my attorney---I hired the supposably very prominent group out of St. Louis that specializes in fathers rights---and it was a HUGE mistake.  The attorney was definately not a trial lawyer by any means---instead of advising me---we would get to a decision and he would ask me what I wanted to do---really!  I kept throwing money I didn't have at them thinking eventually the tide would turn.  Opposing council doesn't like me---I hired him many years and it went bad. 

The situation that first started things bad---my 22 year old stepson disciplined my 12 year old--put his hands on him--which he shouldn't have done---motion was filed to limit contact with him and all of my kids AND included my wife who never did anything.  They made accusations that she cussed at them---which is not true.  As in the past---the motions were filed for times when they knew I was traveling for my job---and my attorney told me to give in to the motions.  There is a history here.  So my kids could not be around my wife or stepsons (all of them) without me being present--which in a supposably shared custody arrangement---and me working--was VERY hard to maintain.

I was then alleged to have assaulted my 12 year old son---he was disciplined when out of countrol and it left a mark on his shoulder where I restrained him.  Ex contacted police---and then SRS.  A temp PFA was put into place.  Police dropped the case and SRS findings came back clear.  We went to court---and the judge kept the PFA on for a year!  We were totally amazed at this.  My attorney avised not to fit it???  At a later trial---the underage kids were permitted to talk to the judge in his chambers---even though it was not scheduled ahead of time.  They were, of course, prepped by their mother to tell the judge they were scared and didnt' want to see me.  The PFA is gone now---but the judge left the no contact order in place saying that he would not force the kids to see me.  I cannot even contact them---we had to fight to be able for me to even go to school events! I have zero criminal record.  My ex, on the other hand, was arrested 15 years ago with assault---to me!  She went into a rampage and then called the police---when they came---the mark was on me and she was arrested.  Criminal pretrial diversion got her out of anything major.  We brought this all up in court---but the judge didn't seem to care.

I also work a high travel job that is very his visibility to the public---ex knows this and plays every card to make sure I can't and won't do anything that may cause a stir.  She has threatened that she will do anything to ruin my career---even though she benefits from it!  I'm just tired of fighting and have basically given up.  My oldest still refuses to have anything to do with my family.

Sorry to bleed to you---I just know there are other people in the same boat with similiar situations.  The law is SO left wing against the father---I don't have the funds to be able to overturn it unfortunately.  If I had a million dollars--I would start a lobby group of some kind to fix this!
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KTM

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Re: KS Case Law
« Reply #4 on: August 23, 2013, 04:38:30 PM »
olatheguyks,

So sorry to hear about your situation. The good news is that given some professional coaching and support for you from a trained psychologist, your adult children can be encouraged and a relationship can be created with you separate from your X- spouse, current spouse and/or any other relative. The psychologist can help you to understand the child's perspective and what you can do to rebuild a relationship with them.

No Contact Orders generally have time limits and dates of expiration. Some have to be renewed annually. If an Order limiting contact with your minor children was written in Civil Court it will likely disappear when the children turn age 18 and the Court looses it's discretion. So the Order has no bearing on any relationship or attempts to have a relationship with your 18 year old child.

Now that the two youngest are age 16 you could challenge the contact orders in Court to get parenting time with them (possibly supervised by a third party). However, at age 16 if they do not want to comply with the Order there is little benefit to forcing the relationship.

The Court had no choice but to protect your children from someone who may harm them given the evidence at the time that you were not able to protect them. Violence like that is taught and without intervention does not get better. It gets worse and the victim gets harmed more seriously as it progresses. I wish you had been counseled to request supervised visitation. That would have allowed you to continue the relationship with your children. Even prisoners are granted supervised visitation of their children while in jail for harming siblings or spouses.

Child Support is for your child's benefit. View it that way and the child will not sense your resentment of them for your having to pay it.
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